The Evolving movement of Temple Nights- going beyond the PlaySpace

Temple nights are so much more than play parties- and as the global movement and scene evolves, they have the potential to positively impact not just the people in the spaces but our collective consciousness.

Let's dive into exploring what these spaces are, their ancient roots and their potential for dismantling patriarchy, shifting sexual trauma and wounding and reclaiming love, beauty and art.

WHAT IS A TEMPLE SPACE, REALLY???

The term 'Temple Night' has been thrown around a lot the last 5 or so years in the global Tantra scene, and it has often become watered down or misused with play parties that have a slight spiritual vibe or aesthetic being called 'Temples', leading many to believe that the term is interchangeable with PlayParty, the same way that people think Tantra is just a term for Sacred Sexuality without honouring the vast spiritual tradition the word represents. 

A Temple Night is in essence a space to worship life through the body, a space for the sacred that can include eroticism and sexuality but doesn't need to. If you attend a Temple Night and find that it's just people hooking up, it's likely not a true temple and more of a conscious play party.

People go to play parties to explore sexuality, while people go to Temple nights to explore the divine, and that may include exploring it through sexuality, but perhaps not.

Of course, there is nothing wrong with a conscious play party- they are amazing experiences that are incredibly supportive for people who are looking to connect, explore and play. I've run countless play parties and had some incredible experiences at them, and the world needs these spaces! However, when you go to an event that gives an impression that it is a spiritual embodied ritual of Eros, and find it to be... NOT that, it can leave people feeling ripped off or disappointed, as well as giving the wrong impression to newer explorers. 

The most basic format of a Temple space is that there is a start and finish time, introductory practices aimed to get people comfortable in the space, with consent and starting to activate some sexual energy, then an open space, then a closing circle.

Unskilled and new facilitators will often just randomly put a few practices in together and keep it very basic (then the depth and flow will be completely dependent on who is in the space at the time and their own embodiment) while skilled facilitators will carefully craft the practices and ritual elements so that people drop into deeper states of presence, openness and access a flow state that then transfers into the open space. 

Some Temples spaces bring in deeper themes to the ritual and space, support people to access a transpersonal ritual experience and inviting a collective erotic trance and shared intention that allows people to step beyond their individual desires and attachments and into something beyond- which is a deep craving of the individual soul. 

When you've run dozens of these spaces, you start to see that there are a variety of factors that influence the way that the space feels in the 'open' time- The layout of the space, the lighting, the practices, the speed, the music- as well as the curation of who is there (is it a 'open to everyone' public event or did you 'vet' the participants to ensure people have shared intention and experience levels) all these factors affect the vibe, depth and flow of the space, as well as factors such as the moon and planetary cycles, weather and other environmental factors. When the vibe is off, the encounters will feel quite shallow, people will be mostly paired off or just not really interacting at all- perhaps many people are hanging out and chatting by the fruit platter or outside. When the vibe is deep, it can feel like walking through honey in the space- there is an otherworldly feeling, there is a depth of presence that feels holy and you can sense there is some real magic in the air. People leave speechless, soft and open, and there is this deep thread weaving everyone together. You feel apart of something, moved, and a deep remembering of something profoundly fundamental in our nature. 

There is so much more potential to what these spaces could be, if the facilitators and participants are willing to go there and move beyond the seeking, chasing and mind-orientation. 

Temple nights are loosely based off the old 'Tantric Feasts' and Sacred Sexuality Temples of the ancient times, where people would come together and open a ritual space for the divine to move through them. Group trance states are highly important here- that we drop out of our 'doing' minds and into a state of being in the body. Devotees would surrender their egoic desires and plans and open up to the mystery, following the thread of where intuition and Eros guide us.

These spaces, rites and rituals were often linked to spiritual paths that embraced Erotic Mysticism, where practitioners felt their connection to the divine was that of a lover, and saw the erotic in all things. The erotic here isn't just about sex- it's about feeling, sensing, embracing, penetration and receptivity. Most spiritual paths had branches of erotic mystics- including Christianity, Judaism, Sufism and more obviously Tantric and Daoist traditions. 

Tantric Feasts generally involved extensive group chanting and meditation to access the unified field of consciousness and enter the flow state before opening up for spontaneous aliveness to move through, which often involved dancing, spontaneous poetry, sacred sexuality, meditation and other forms of creative spontaneous expression. 

Other rituals in history included taking psychedelics, drinking wine or other sacraments and surrendering to ecstatic states, loosing the self in drunken bliss and joy and offering the bliss to the divine.

Generally, access to these spaces in ancient times required people to be initiated and have a similar level of training, skill and foundational practice before entering. For someone to enter these spaces with no training in presence, no awareness of consent and boundaries, no self-reflection on their trauma patterns- well, it gets messy (or even downright dangerous) And when we're talking about transpersonal experience- each participant affects the whole, so the entire field is impacted by those who are not ready or in capacity for these spaces. 

To navigate the current of Eros with integrity, to step into a space with so much energy and vulnerability, it's important to 'train' to know how to navigate embodied consent and boundaries, how to open interactions with others and how to move on without attachment. While we may conceptually understand consent and boundaries, the patterns are deeply ingrained on an unconscious level and require a level of actual practice and training to move beyond. This is why I and many others require foundational training before coming into Temple spaces, so that there is a collective understanding, language and understanding before opening the space. This invites both safety AND depth. 

We also need to learn to stay embodied and not get lost in the mind, and how to be with the strong force that is our sexual energy without being leaky, controlling or grasping. Attunement is one of the most important frequencies to embody in these places and it takes practice! We can learn and grow within these spaces, learning from others who are in the space as we explore them. The more the group become attuned, sensitive and present, the deeper the space can go. This is why creating regular temple spaces and a community surrounding them is so beautiful and important.

HOW TEMPLES CAN DISMANTLE PATRIARCHY

 A fascinating thing you learn when you study the history of sacred sexuality is that the fall of the Temples of Eros coincides with the rise of Patriarchy. 

You discover that before the rise of the Abrahamic major religions that systematically repressed women and sexuality, there were Temples primarily run by women that were spaces to worship the body, the Erotic and the Earth. The 'Divine Feminine' aspect of reality includes these aspects, and the major religions not only destroyed the Temples, the books and much of the history but went so far as to hunt down women and burn them alive. 

The Temples were a space to experience the divine DIRECTLY through your own body, and organised religion wanted to externalise the divine so that people would have to pay and follow them to experience that connection.

Since people often felt their infinite power and connection to the infinite through sacred sex, it was cast to the shadow, suppressed and controlled, and it still is. All of us who work with sexuality still to this day face constant censorship, even having bank accounts removed, limited reach and various issues sharing our work. 

In our modern age there is so much sexual trauma, shame, violence and pain. Sex turned from being one of the most potent sources of love and nourishment available to something painful, addictive or to capitalise on. 

The sacred and the sexual were split, though anyone who has dived into reclaiming the sacred aspect of sexuality has tasted the power here. It is the deepest type of communion and prayer, and it has the power to transform, alchemise and create beyond what we could have imagined. 

Temple Spaces are an invitation BACK to our roots, to our fundamental nature of wholeness, goodness and beauty. We see in these spaces the potential for humans to come together in love, goodness and beauty. Where sex becomes art, it becomes a prayer. Where womens bodies are worshipped and honoured and where true respectful love can bloom.

It is so much more than hedonistic pursuits and a group of people 'getting off'

It's a deep remembering of an aspect of our humanity and our divinity, and how they are not separate. We can touch the divine through melting into other bodies, connecting with other hearts, dancing and crying and singing as we heal and remember.

We break beyond heteronormative ideas and remember our soul-based connection that goes beyond what genitals someone has- men can embrace other men without making it mean anything. Women can celebrate other women's beauty and pleasure and move beyond competition and cattiness. 

If we take the time to slow people down, drop out of our conditioned patterns of seeking and chasing and find that gateway into BEING, receiving, flowing... we discover a whole new realm of possibility. We start to decondition the distorted eroticism we've been left with after centuries of sexual repression and shame, and create a new empowering relationship with this energy. 

The world truly needs more love, beauty, wholeness and connection. These spaces can evolve to meet that collective need and bring sexuality out of the shadow of trauma-based pseudo-eros and into a new Era. 

And Sacred Sexuality teachers and facilitators can play a major role in this, if they're willing to truly commit to the cause and cultivate new levels of mastery so that their spaces are truly sacred spaces. 

 Here is a beautiful spoken-word poetry creation by Maya Luna that evokes a sense of what happens when we enter the temple. 

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For 8 years now, I've been creating and facilitating Esoteric sexuality and playspaces, ranging from very intimate private gatherings to festivals, retreats and fetish clubnights. 

When I first started to explore combining play parties with Sacred sexuality, I had never heard of a Temple night- I don't know if they even existed yet under that name, and if they did I wasn't exposed to them- but I knew in my heart that there was something there to explore. Something that was missing from the play parties and sexuality events I'd been encountering. 

I've travelled the world experiencing countless Temple nights, play parties, sexuality festivals, fetish parties and spaces dedicated to Eros, Love and Play. I've got to witness this blooming 'scene' and how it's evolving, and I have met countless friends, colleagues and lovers in these spaces over the years. 

I'm grateful to be growing alongside this movement, constantly evolving and taking these spaces deeper and sharing the wisdom along the way. 

I have offerings both for people who are wanting to explore these spaces, as well as for professionals looking to upskill around their facilitation.

 If you want to come on a deep dive journey, this retreat is for you! We'll have a whole week to train the skills to navigate these spaces and dive deeper into practice together. Join the Sensual Arts Retreat and experience the Temple of Sensual Arts (and much more!)

 This is my new course for Facilitators, featuring 5 other amazing guests bringing their wisdom on holding incredible Temple and Play spaces. Check out Devoted to Eros