The Manifesting Power of Eros- Exploring Sex Magic

Sex magic is officially reaching the mainstream. In the last few years I have seen some of the most mainstream news outlets reporting on it, and my social media posts about the practice seem to get the most attention. It’s definitely something that intrigues people and they’re getting curious to try it for themselves.

Sex magic is something that can be practiced with a partner or alone, and it has routes in a variety of different cultures and spiritual paths. When I first heard of sex magic, it was something like the idea of making a wish when you blow out a candle. “Think of something you want as you orgasm!” a friend told me, and I tried it out but found very little results (and had difficulty remembering to think of it after getting swept away in a steamy sex session!)

Now after spending years studying and experimenting with it, I can see why that basic approach didn’t really do anything.

You see, sex magic is far more than just making a wish when you orgasm. It is an intentional, ritualistic container to move erotic life-force power through the body, come into alignment with the future you want to create and allowing the portal of the orgasmic state to link your current reality and your desired future reality. It may sound very esoteric and sci-fi like, but more and more neuroscience studies are showing how deeply embodied visualisation combined with intentionality and action can create a change in our brain which helps us to see the new possibilities and feel ‘safe’ to accept them because it feels like we have already been in this future reality and known we are able to survive it (and thrive!).

You see, one of the biggest reasons why we don’t get what we want is that we have a primal, deep fear of the unknown, and we believe it is safer (and therefore better) to stay in our current reality than to take the risk of change that could result in a less favourable outcome. 

So if it’s just about visualisation and intentionality, where does sex come in?

When we are in erotic states, particularly around climax/orgasm, our brain enters into different functionality than our day to day mode. A lot of our cortex has to go offline for us to relax and surrender into orgasm, and the primal/reptilian brain is more online, as well as parts of the limbic/emotional center. Real, intentional and deep desire isn’t in the cortex, it’s deep in the subconscious areas of the brain. It’s our desire to FEEL a certain way, to LIVE a certain way. We may have a story and logical process of why we want said desire, but anything really significant will have a much deeper emotional imprint that goes beyond the rational and logical mind. This is where the magic happens, because magic is essentially turning the subconscious, conscious. It’s aligning all parts of your being together so you are an integrated and therefore empowered person, not ruled by your unconscious patterns and cycled of suffering.

True magic comes from your deepest desires and intentions being in alignment with the pattern of reality. When your desires are coming from conditioning and ego, you might get something you want but it doesn’t get you the feeling you deeply desire. So even when our desires come true, we aren't able to appreciate and celebrate them, they feel empty and pointless.

Real, effective sex magic is about aligning all parts of your being with your desire and getting clear about how you want to feel and how this will help you live a more authentic, liberated and awakened life. If you are able to fuse your erotic energy with this deep intention and vision for how you wish to live your life then you can open yourself up to the universal energy of desire, merge with the greater pattern of harmony and flow, and step into that new and aligned future. 

This goes beyond basic Law of Attraction and into the non-dual realm of desire, where you are willing to accept all of life how it is, trust the greater pattern yet still welcome and invite in your desire, celebrating it as an expression of universal intelligence. Desire is part of consciousness, it is the pull of your heart to want to bring more harmony and love to the world. When you align your sexual energy (therefore your raw, primal, life force power) with the desire in your heart and sublimate it through the crown and into connection with the cosmos, you can become a portal for transformation and change.

I have a few different techniques I use for sex magic rituals now, and a lot of the time I like to freeflow and see what wants to happen once I open up the intention and energy- but when you’re new it is great to start with some guidance and structure.

The basics of the practice are…

•  Setting a sacred space, whatever that means to you.
• Setting an intention (if you’re practicing with a partner, have a shared intention and speak it to each other)
• Create a bridge between your current reality and the desired one (Visualisation, totems, sigils..) 
• Start to activate the erotic energy. I personally work with Tantric techniques of moving energy up from the sexual center through my chakras and to my crown, inviting my orgasm to happen when the energy is flowing all the way from my genitals to my crown.
•  As you orgasm, be in the future reality in whichever way works with your bridging technique.  
• Finish with gratitude, appreciation and honouring before closing the ritual space. 

As I mentioned, there are a lot of techniques out there depending on the tradition you are practicing from. My personal path is Tantra so that is the lineage I work with (though it is debated if ancient Tantrikas used sex magic or not due to their most esoteric teachings being destroyed or only passed on verbally), though there are Pagan, Celtic, Nordic, Indigenous, Hermetic  and other styles and practices out there. The practice of using sexual energy for manifestation is not a new one and is not limited to a single culture or belief system.

Sex magic can be a fun thing to explore, but should be used with caution. Never try to over-ride someone's free will and make sure your intentions are in alignment with your highest values, or things can get messy fast. And always, surrender is the most important part. Once you have done your ritual you must surrender to whatever life wants to move through you, as clinging and grasping to your desire will only cause suffering. Things will work in the time they are meant to happen and never sooner. Set your intentions and desires, take some aligned actions that feel right and then let the universe do the work.

Want to learn the Art of Sex Magic? Luna had a Valentines workshop for couples where people were guided through a 1 hour Sex Magic ritual, exploring a non-dual approach to Sex Magic and creating a deep and sensual space for lovers to connect. It is queer friendly and replays are available if you can’t make it live!
Check it out > here <

And if you’re single you can learn Sex Magic in her ‘Deep Self Worship’ online journey into solo Tantra.